Some boat names make you chuckle

[DesertAlbin736]

We got a chuckle out of some boat names we saw in our travels recently. When I think of a boat's name I try to picture a VHF PAN PAN or MAYDAY call for help to the Coast Guard. One Bayliner we saw was named "It Don't Matter". I imagine the call going something like this

CG: "Station calling Coast Guard, what is your boat's name"
Reply: "It Don't Matter".
CG: "YES IT DOES MATTER, what's your boat name?"
Reply: "It Don't Matter, and we need help, we're taking on water"
CG: "Don't be a wise guy! I can't help you if you won't tell me your boat's name!"

Another was "Fraid Knot".
CG: "Can you tell me your boat's name?"
Boater: "Fraid Knot"
CG: "You got a problem with telling me you boat name?" (off mic: "hey Chief, we got another wise guy here")

Knot So Fast to CG:
PAN PAN, Gulfport Coast Guard"
CG: What's your boat's name?
KSF: "Knot so fast"
CG (speaking slowly): What....Is...Your...Boat's.... Name?

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And my favorite...

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[boater_mike]

These remind me of a commercial I saw once featuring a call to the "German Coast Guard".

Radio: "Mayday!! Mayday!! We are sinking!! We are Sinking!!".

German Coast Guard: "Ya....allo...Vat are you sinking about?"

[hetek]

When trying to think of a boat name, I always "test say" them out loud, to myself, just to hear what they would sound like on the radio.

Many potential names have gone to the deep six because they didn't pass the test.

Not only Pan Pans or Maydays, but also hailing marinas, towing services, pump out boats, etc. You have to be sure they know who you are and who they are looking for, without confusion.